Barnes and Noble

So apparently I've been permanently banned from the Barnes and Noble on the 16th street mall in Denver, Colorado. Before you judge me so harshly, however, you should hear my tragic tale.

Matthew and I had some free time before heading to the Nightwish concert, so we decided, innocently enough, to go wander around the Barnes and Noble. Things started well enough; I really enjoy being in book stores and looking at various books, so a good time was had by all. We were standing in front of a particular shelf looking at some classics and considering, god forbid, spending some money. We were carefully looking at leatherbound copies of the complete works of Lewis Caroll when a balding gentleman appearing to be in his late 30s or 40s, wearing a grey jacket with a red carnation, approached us from behind. He appeared to be talking on his cell phone so Matthew and I did the polite thing and ignored him. Unbeknownst to us, however, he was actually trying to get our attention. He touched me on the shoulder and said "Excuse me," and I got out of the way. To Matthew, though, who was standing in front of me, he was considerably less polite.

Clearly annoyed that we had the audacity to be present in his store when he needed to walk there, he said a more assertive "Excuse me," and shoved Matthew out of the way. He pushed past him and walked over to the Starbucks coffee shop as if he was the most important person in the world. Understand, though, that there were many paths to the Starbucks, some more convenient, than the one we happened to be unwittingly standing in. Being the less assertive of the two of us, I was content to just click my tongue and say "What an asshole," but Matthew, understandably, was less than happy to be shoved aside.

Throwing his hands in the air in frustration, he shouted "Thanks for pushing me!" and then rolled his eyes and began to walk away. In retrospect that might have been a mistake, but I will come to his defense and say that there is nothing inherently wrong with expressing indignation when someone is rude to you, even in a public place. The balding carnation-wearing gentleman, clearly much more important than we drags of the universe, clearly thought otherwise.

He came up to us and started grilling us about how he told us several times to move and that when we made no notice of his presence, he touched us gently to get our attention. This might be so, but since he was on the phone, we figured it would be rude to eavesdrop on his conversation, and thus had no idea that he was trying to talk to us, and as far as I know he certainly wasn't saying "excuse me" loudly enough for us to take notice. Second of all, he did not touch Matthew to get his attention, but clearly shoved him out of the way. Since there were plenty of ways to go around us, this is inexcusable as far as I can tell.

At this point, he threatened to call the police on us, and said in a probably-fake Brittish accent that he would "Like for us to leave and would appreciate it if we didn't come back." Matthew simply told him that it "Wouldn't be a problem," but I, being the shy pussy that I am, said nothing. I regret that. 

First of all, I was unaware that the gentleman was a store employee to begin with. By the way he was acting, however, that's the only conclusion I could come to. That and I'm not sure why a non-employee would go around wearing a carnation on his jacket, but hey, maybe he thought it made him look cooler than everyone else. He clearly thought this to begin with. But anyway, had he just been some random would-be literature snob, any one thing he said or did might have been ignorable on its own, but his attitude was absolutely inexcusable for a store employee. 

Had I been a little bit smarter and braver, I would have asked him if he was the store manager. If he had been the store manager, then I would have told him that he really ought to treat his customers with some level of respect. We really had been looking at books and considering buying them and spending money at his store. But because of the way he treated us, we left without spending a penny, and it is unlikely that either of us will ever spend any money in his store or perhaps any Barnes and Noble ever again. If he values his job at all, he really ought to remember who it is that keep stores like his in business to begin with. If he was not the store manager, then he had absolutely no right or authority whatsoever to tell us to leave the store, and even less of a right to tell us not to come back. I would have loved to point this out to him, and more importantly, to point it out to his manager, who could take appropriate action. However, at the time, I was simply too angry to think of a witty response, and we both just left the store in disgust. I guess this is another one of those situations when I was too damned polite for my own good.

Silly me.

The bottom line is, as a store employee he had no right to treat us the way he did. I have worked in retail and much more extensively in customer service, and I have dealt with all manner of disgruntled customers, many much ruder than we were in retaliation to his initial rudeness. Perhaps we could have been more diplomatic in our response to the gentleman's shoving, however, calling an employee out on his rudeness is NOT grounds to be kicked out of the store, and it is even LESS grounds for calling the police, which the gentleman angrily threatened to do. In the end, I regret not taking the action I could have taken, but until Barnes and Noble learns the value of the customers that keep them afloat, it will be Borders and Amazon only for me.

Test

This is a test to see if the blog still works, please disregard this post.

"Blog Sovereignty" and the Bloggers' Code of Conduct

There has been a lot of talk recently about whether or not the author of a blog has the right to moderate the comments that people make. The death threats against Kathy Sierra has gotten the blogging community up in arms about what is right and what is wrong to post on the internet. According to the bloggers' Code of Conduct suggested by Tim O'Reilly and Jimmy Wales, the writer of a blog is not only responsible for their own words that they put on their blog but also the words of those who comment -- meaning that, if someone posts something that the owner doesn't like, they have the right to moderate or delete it. This has created a lot of controversy because many argue that this is a violation of free speech. However, I am here to make the argument for what I like to refer to as "Blog sovereignty."

Basically what I mean by blog sovereignty is that your blog is your blog. This blog, which I have called "Rantings and Ravings," is my blog. I control what goes on it, and insofar as I stay within the rules of my blogspot.com host, I can post whatever I want. In that, I have freedom of speech. However, because this blog is mine, and not that of the visitors of the blog, such a freedom should not have to extend to them. If I do not want certain things to be posted on my blog, then I believe that I am perfectly in my right to moderate that. In fact, I can even go so far as to suggest that I don't want people commenting at all, though I suppose that would make the blog a rather boring place. And certainly, if someone comments on my blog with something that I find inappropriate or excessively rude, then I am and should be allowed to delete it.

But is that not infringing on free speech? Not at all, I say. If someone really has a huge problem with me, then they can feel free to start their own blog and say it there. I might not agree with it and I might be hurt by it but as long as it's not on my blog then I won't do anything about it.

That does not, however, mean that you have open permission to be a jerk. I cannot stop you from writing a hate blog about me, though really, I would say that would be a gross waste of time and energy and there are many many better things that you can do with your time. But besides being a waste, it is also just not very nice at all. One of the major problems with the internet is the relative anonymity we are all awarded. Sure, you can log my IP address, but for all you know I'm typing this from a library computer and you'll never find me. And besides, many laymen don't even know how to log an IP address. I know I certainly don't. But even though eventually finding me is possible, it is still a much more anonymous sphere. I am not speaking to you face to face. I could say things to you over the internet that I would never dream of saying in real life, because communicating via text is much easier than communicating face to face. I do not have to worry about tripping over my words, or my voice cracking, or my eye twitching in an undesired way. More importantly, I do not have to witness your reaction firsthand. In most cases it will be several days before you react, if you do at all, and if/when it does happen, you will also be far away and safe at your computer. And hence the flame-war begins. Because of a variety of factors -- anonymity, time delay, and lack of face-to-face interaction, it is just plain easier to be a jerk on the net.

What it should come down to is just good common sense. The blogger's code of conduct suggests that you shouldn't say something online that you wouldn't say in real life. Remember that just because the recipient is far away and the reaction is delayed doesn't mean that words can hurt any less. This has been demonstrated already by Ms. Sierra, who canceled her public appearances and stopped updating her blog because of threats made against her. Certainly free speech is important, but if someone does not feel comfortable allowing just any comments on their blog, then they should be able to moderate that.

The other problem is that if blogs are moderated, it might be taken too far. Harmless posts could be removed simply because they disagree with the original blogger. Again, I say use common sense here. If a blogger is so high and mighty that they are going to remove comments that disagree with them, then a lot of people will stop going to their blog. I still stand by my idea of Blog Sovereignty, and believe that you are well within your right to do this. But you have to understand that it is going to color your reputation in a negative way. Ultimately it is a judgment call on your part whether or not a comment should be removed. Also, if your blog is moderated, you should make it clear from the start that it is, and clarify what sorts of entries will be removed. That way, if someone does become disgruntled due to the removal of their comments, they will at least know that they were warned, or, if they truly believe their comment was removed unjustly, they will have some sort of guidelines to go from.

Once again, I would like to reiterate: If you want free speech, go start your own blog. This blog was created on blogger, and it was very easy to do. If you want to go write a long and detailed tirade about what a stupid blog this is -- and I admit, with only one entry so far, it's a rather stupid blog -- then please, go right ahead. Not quite sure anyone will read it and I'm sure you've got better things to do with your time, but hey, it's a free internet. However, this blog is mine, and I reserve the right to moderate comments as I see fit. Not, mind, that I expect to get many comments, since I only made this blog for a final in one of my classes and may or may not ever look at or post in it again. However, just to clarify, any hateful, sexist, or racist comments will be deleted, as will, certainly, any death threats. Arguments will be allowed as long as they don't "go for the throat," so to speak. I believe that since I am the creator of this blog, I have the right to do this. Other creators of other blogs do not have to follow these guidelines, though they certainly can if they want to. It is, after all, Blog Sovereignty.

Links:
Call for a Blogger's Code of Conduct:
http://radar.oreilly.com/archives/2007/03/call_for_a_blog_1.html

The Actual Blogger's Code of Conduct:
http://blogging.wikia.com/wiki/Blogger's_Code_of_Conduct

Creating Passionate Users (Kathy Sierra's Blog)
http://headrush.typepad.com/creating_passionate_users/